
ad⋅ver⋅si⋅ty [ad-vur-si-tee]–noun, plural -ties for 2.
1. adverse fortune or fate; a condition marked by misfortune, calamity, or distress: A friend will show his or her true colors in times of adversity.
2. an adverse or unfortunate event or circumstance: You will meet many adversities in life.
Origin: 1200–50; L adversitās.
Synonyms: 1. catastrophe, disaster; trouble, misery. 2. See affliction.
Antonyms: 1. prosperity.
Everyone, at one point or another, is faced with adversity. If you're like me, you have many loved ones in your life that are being hit, spun around and dropped to their knees with adversity. Fresh rounds of layoffs continue, foreclosures loom, relationships are strained. If you are one of those people, this is for you.
The Upsides of Adversity
"Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed on an equal or greater benefit." Napoleon Hill
Adversity brings appreciation
As swell as it is to image all of your problems disappearing, if you lived in a state of perfection everyday, you wouldn't like it. There'd be no contrast and therefore, nothing to appreciate. A perfect world would be, well, boring rather than wonderful. As the Taoists say, "If we do not experience darkness, how can we appreciate the light?"
Years ago, my brother, who was attending the University of Arizona at the time, called me in cloudy, dreary Michigan to say, "I'm so frustrated! Another hot, sunny day! I haven't seen a cloud or rain in months. Or thunder! Thunder would be awesome. Just one cloud would be helpful. I'm going crazy with all this sun!" And he was serious.
It's the contrast of these dark days that makes the future look so bright.
Adversity brings spiritual growth
We wouldn't grow spiritually if we didn't have challenges to overcome. Challenges are huge opportunities for personal and spiritual growth. Faith, gratitude and love can help us to see that the block in the path is simply an obstacle to maneuver around...many times leading us to a better path.
Adversity shows you who your true loved ones are
This one's right there in the dictionary definition of adversity: "A friend will show his or her true colors in times of adversity." There is no better time to know your real friends than in the heat of adversity. A friend of mine posted on Facebook a couple of days ago that he lost his job of 10+ years. Today he wrote, "I'm overwhelmed with all the support I have received in the last 2 days. This is turning out to be one big positive!"
Adversity shows you who you really are
There is no better time to know yourself than in the heat of adversity. When a broken bone heals, the area around the break can actually become stronger than it was before. Adversity can do that too. It can take our weak spots, help us heal and become stronger than ever.
Adversity offers opportunity
The Chinese character for 'crisis' is 'peril' + 'opportunity.' Interesting, huh? When a job is lost, a major client parts ways or a relationship ends, it's a chance to rebuild in a way that's more in alignment with our ultimate goals and highest selves. Many times folks are laid off from a job they didn't like in the first place. Or they fear losing a client who's in reality a pain-in-the-neck and an energy vampire. We've all had the experience of trying to hold onto a relationship only to look back on it later thinking, "If that hadn't ended, I wouldn't have been free to meet my true love."
Instead of mourning the loss, use the time and energy to attract a better situation than before. This is not the end, it's the beginning. Create it the way you want it.
The solution is in your response
You need to remind yourself in the vertigo of the crisis that the lesson is not about the particular issue at hand, it's about the way you respond to it.
Tune into success
Think back to past times when you were able to overcome adversity. Didn't it feel great? It's a fulfilling pride like no other. Focus on that feeling to connect with the Law of Attraction. It's like tuning into a radio station. Whatever you are 'listening' to (or reading, watching, talking about), you will get more of the same. So tune into station KJOY or KHOPE rather than KFAIL or KWHYME. Don't you know someone who seems to be constantly tuned into KSHIT? All they do is complain about their lousy life and they seems to get more of the same. Yeah, don't do that.
Make a plan, Stan
Here is my action plan for handling adversity:
- Be still and breathe.
- Picture the best possible outcome while being open to it arriving in a way that serves the highest good.
- Take continual steps toward that outcome.
- Create support systems and surroundings that encourages the goal.
- Focus on gratitude and the joyous of feeling the goal being reached.
- Repeat until it is so.
Work that plan
Winston Churchill said, "If you're going through hell, keep going!" So go! Don't live in denial. Don't dawdle. Don't create paralysis of analysis. Leap! Jump! Pounce! Sitting around talking about why an adverse situation happened will only create more of it. Focusing on the thing that will make you ultimately happy (new job, more clients, true love) will create more of that.
Have patience and don't quit before the miracle
Churchill also said, when asked to give a speech on his recommendations for creating success: "Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, give up. Never give up. Never give up. Never give up."
Many of us are completely unprepared for today's challenges. Because we're spoiled. We're not used to facing such difficulties or having to work so hard just to put food on the table. In Churchill's times, to have dinner, they had to grow the food before preparing it. We've been living in times where we not only didn't have to grow our own food, we haven't even had to prepare it! The salad's in the bag, ready to go! We don't even have to go into the store...we can just drive thru!
So it's time to dig deep. Our greatest personal and national character builder stands before us in the days ahead. Let's be still, breathe and picture the sweet banquet when we celebrate our victory. Carpe Diem!